What a difference a week makes
My last post on the blog, posted last Tuesday, was titled “4 weeks to Boston”. Today, just five days later, it’s much more likely that I’m looking at 55 weeks until Boston. Yes, I’m nearly certain that I’m going to mail my registration card back to the BAA and ask for a deferral to run in next year’s marathon instead.
The crazy thing is that it’s not by back that’s forcing this decision, it’s my knee. After running last Saturday, my right knee was really sore. Instead of sore muscles, it was soreness around the kneecap. Soreness I’d never had before, but thoughts of Elizabeth’s troubles from this time last year had me nervous. By the time I posted my blog entry on Tuesday, it was much better, but still “off” – tender to the touch and a perpetual dull ache at points around the outside edge of my kneecap. I had a long call with Coach John on Tuesday and he was more worried about it than I was – he convinced me to take this one very seriously and to take the week off running. At that point, the chances of me running Boston dropped to something like 50/50, at best. Last week was to be a big running week – probably my last big one before the marathon. So not only was I potentially injured, I was skipping some very important final preparation and a very important long run. I had two major concerns – first, that I am injured and actually can’t run the marathon or second, that I am on the verge of a serious injury and running a marathon without being fully prepared would put me over the edge and jeopardize at least the rest of this season.
With all that in mind, I agreed to take the week off from running and instead did some easier bikes, a couple swims and a lot of stretching, icing and leg-strengthening exercises, such as step-ups and lunges. And frankly, while I think it’s gotten better over the last week, I’m not convinced that it’s gotten enough better to get me in a marathon in three weeks. It doesn’t “hurt” per se, but I constantly notice that something isn’t right. It’s a strange feeling that’s part ache, part tightness and part weakness. Walking doesn’t bother it, neither does cycling or swimming. When I do my exercises, it only bothers me on the “push” part, like when I stand up from a lunge or squat or push myself up on my right leg in a step-up. No “pain” really, I’d call it more discomfort. About every 30 seconds, I think about putting on my running shoes and testing the knee to see if running hurts, but I’m using every last drop of willpower to keep myself from doing that.
It’s not an easy decision to sit this one out, but I’m pretty well convinced that it’s the right one. I still believe that if I wanted to, I could run it – regardless of what’s going on with my knee. I could even finish with an acceptable time. But all along my plan has been to run Boston for the experience – to enjoy running this historical race that I earned the right to run. But if I’m worried about my knee and what kind of medium- or long-term damage I was doing to myself, would it be any fun? I doubt it. I have a good, fun racing season planned and if I have to leave this one off this time in order to save the rest of the season, that sounds like a worthy trade. It’s bummer, definitely, but this decision is one I’m willing to live with.
Now that I’m done rationalizing, I’ll admit that I’m very disappointed. Last year, I was blessed with a generally injury free season. This year it’s been one thing after another. I had started looking back on injuries I’d suffered before I started triathlons and began to think that I’d figured it all out and with careful training, I’d be injury free forever. Now I feel vulnerable again. And that sucks. I spent some time on the phone today with my personal long-distance physician, Assaf, and it doesn’t seem like there’s any structural damage. Hopefully it’s just a tweak, something that time away from running and some strength training and stretching will cure. Hopefully. I’ll try to actually see a doctor this week for confirmation. If that is the case, I’ll concentrate on the bike and the swim (which I’ve been neglecting), I’ll do my exercises, and take my time getting back to running. I have a great running base and don’t think my running will suffer too much if I have to keep the running shoes locked up for a couple more weeks. (My running might not suffer, but my psyche and emotions certainly will. Running – much more so than any other physical activity – keeps me in check and relaxed and helps me sleep. I’ve felt it this week – anxious, trouble focusing, sleepless nights. Sweet.) I am also worried about the rest of the season… I know that worrying is not productive, but training is a big part of my life and I’ve been looking forward to racing again. I just need to keep reminding myself that I have plenty of time to fix this, but that it will all be gone if I don’t take care of myself.
Swim – March 26
Distance: 1,750 yards
Time: 30 minutes
Indoor ride – March 27
Time: 1:30
Average heart rate: 113
Swim – March 28
Distance: 2,400 yards
Time: 50 minutes
Indoor bike (VO2 Max) – March 29
Time: 1:15
Average heart rate: 122
Strength – March 29
Bike – March 30
Distance: 32.9 miles
Time: 1:55
Average heart rate: 119
Course: West Side Highway to Central Park
Conditions: Cool (high 30’s-low 40’s), sunny, some wind